About Me
I have over 15 years of experience as a therapist specializing in couple therapy and supporting individuals and partners in communicating about matters related to intimacy. For your convenience, I provide teletherapy services throughout the state of New York.
Seeking help and being vulnerable with a stranger can be an excruciatingly tricky experience, especially when talking about intimacy. I pride myself on creating a safe, warm, and supportive environment, where I use a strength-based perspective, as well as mindfulness and cognitive behavioral strategies to support you. I want to guide and help you learn effective ways to express yourself to your significant other to nurture a partnership that feels safe and fulfilling for all. My passion is helping couples of racial, cultural, gender, socioeconomic, and sexual orientations navigate challenging communication patterns & sexual connections toward a deeper and more fulfilling relationship.
My interest in being a sex therapist was initially sparked by my experience of receiving many misconceptions and myths about intimacy, sex, and partnerships. I am the daughter of two immigrants. While my parents came from different parts of the world, one common theme was the stigma about mental health and false assumptions about partnerships and intimacy. As a Latina therapist that believes in social justice, I wanted to help people find sexual pleasure, and body positivity, while forming healthy attachments, and being able to advocate for their needs. I provide services in English, Spanish, and German.
When I was introduced to couples and family therapy in my graduate studies, I was immediately drawn to the idea that our experiences in our families of origin impact our presence in relationships. After obtaining my Masters in Social Work, I completed a post-graduate training certificate at the Ackerman Institute for the Family to strengthen my skills and expertise in working relationally to help couples and individuals intervene on problematic patterns that keep them stuck and move toward more growth and vitality.
In addition to my family therapy training, I completed my B.S. at Hunter College and my M.S.W. at Columbia University. I also graduated from the renowned University of Michigan’s Sexual Health Sex Therapy Certificate Program supervised & taught by many of the most formative practitioners and experts on relationships and sexuality in the field. I am an AASECT certified Sex Therapist.
In my spare time, I participate in endurance sports and have completed various Ironman triathlons, an ultra-marathon, and a number of marathons. I use my training for these events as a platform for my ways of thinking about the world and life. Being an endurance athlete allows me to develop patience, greater insight into how the body and mind work, as well as openness, to be in a state of discomfort in order to surpass challenges.
Couples Therapy
Many couples report feeling happy in their relationship most of the time. However, with a small proportion of them, interactions can turn volatile, leading to extreme anger, withdrawal, and hurt. When volatility strikes it generally follows a pattern: it’s typically triggered by a partner’s specific action, inaction or response. I work with couples to help them recognize their relationship’s patterns, understand each other’s triggers, and finally break this cycle. .
COUPLES OFTEN SEEK THERAPY TO:
Find effective ways to communicate and manage conflicts
Increase connection and intimacy
Understand relationship dynamics
Navigate life cycle transitions such as marriage, having children, loss, separation, and divorceRepair ruptures, like infidelity and betrayals, that decrease trust.
Co-parenting
Sex Therapy
Sex therapy is a form of psychotherapy, which is talk therapy. While sexuality, intimacy and relationship dynamics play a significant role in our lives, people refrain from talking about these subjects. As a couple therapist and sex therapist, my goal is to help you feel positive and confident about your mental and sexual health. I am an LGTBQ+ affirming therapist.
Sex therapy does NOT include the act of sex or sex surrogacy in the office.
People often seek sex therapy to:
work through struggles related to desire, arousal, orgasm, and painful sex.
improve communication.
explore challenges with intimacy after childbirth
attain support with overcoming sexual trauma.
Media
FERVENT WELLNESS
EP 04: Breaking Down Intimacy Issues and The Power of Therapy with Melissa Thoen, LCSW
NY POST
How to handle coronavirus tension with relationships and roommates
VEJA
As mudancas nas relacoes humanas por causa da pandemia de coronavirus
I invite you to schedule a complimentary 15-minute phone consultation to talk about how I can help you. Fill out the form below or email me at melissathoen.lcsw@gmail.com. I always reply to inquiries so please check your spam folder for my email response,
Contact
Please complete the form below or email me at melissathoen.lcsw@gmail.com
SESSION FEES
I value therapy being accessible and therefore charge $300 for a 55 minute session and $400 for a 75 minute for couples session. Sessions for individuals are $250 for 55 minutes.
PAYMENT
Payment is accepted in the form of credit card, cash, or Zelle. Ask your employer about a health savings account that may assist you with payments.
INSURANCE
At this time I accept private pay clients and can provide documentation for out-of-network insurance reimbursement.
CANCELLATION FEES
Appointments must be canceled or rescheduled within 24 hours of the scheduled time or you will still be responsible for the full session fee.
